Originally posted November 2009 in Mommy Diaries.
Who cares? - November 2, 2009
In the October update, I mentioned Sassy's first ever class party. I hate to put it this way, (because let me be clear that I know this is SO not about me), but it was also my first class party, too, in a way. I was a rookie at knowing when to sign up to bring stuff, and what stuff to sign up for, and whether or not to bring treat bags for the other kiddos, and whether or not we were even supposed to come. (Like, was this party just for the kiddos, or did they want the grown-ups to come? I've run class parties before, and trust me when I say they ALWAYS go better when parents are not present. On the flip side, however, that is for big, school-aged kids, and these are young, pre-school kids. Were there different rules for stuff like this?) And on and on...
The scariest rookie moment came when I was deciding whether or not to send Sassafras to school IN her costume. Big deal, right? Well, apparently I thought it was. I worried about what everyone else was going to do. Were all the other kids going to come in wearing their costumes, too, or would they all just bring their suits and change for the party? What if Sass was the only one wearing her costume? What if I sent her in regular clothes and she was the only one NOT wearing her costume? What would she think if she walked in her class (still not an easy transition in the mornings) and saw everyone else but her wearing regular clothes, or saw everyone but her wearing their costumes?
And then, a still small voice :) whispered in my ear...
"WHO CARES?! She's 2. This is a party. Get over it.
And, moreover, how in the world are you ever going to raise her to make a difference in the world if you are teaching her to be afraid of what everyone else is thinking or that she should always do what everyone else is doing?"
OK, Lord, I hear You. Loud and clear.
From BEFORE we ever conceived Sassafrass, I prayed for her to be an individual who is strong, intelligent, beautiful, and a leader. I prayed for her to be a person to make a difference for the Kingdom of God. I know it may not make sense to get to this point from my crazy anxieties over some little party, but this was the truth I felt the Lord teaching me sitting in that parking lot at Sassafras's little school. Had any of those fears about her wearing that costume come true, it would have been no big deal.
But I remembered in that moment that it is a lifetime of having the right attitude about these experiences that will help teach her about perspective. Simply because of the way God is knitting together our little family, we know that Sass, Pearl, and all our children are destined to stand out. It is my prayer that they will shine like the stars they were created to be, and that when they are faced with worries over what everyone else would think or what everyone else is doing, that they would hear the same still, small voice saying...